Jacquelyn S. Gonz, Attorney At Law Llc

Four mistakes parents make after a messy divorce

Parenting is one of the most difficult jobs you’ll ever have, and divorce only increases the challenge. Most parents struggle with transitioning out of a relationship and end up making mistakes with their children along the way.

Luckily, major mistakes are preventable as long as parents know what to look out for and how to approach the problem if it arises. Some of the most common mistakes parent make after a divorce are:

Using your child as a sounding board

It’s incredibly easy to feel alone or detached from others after a rough separation. It may even feel like no one understands your situation, except your child. However, parents cannot use their children like therapists.

Telling them all your relationship problems or bagging on your ex eventually damages the child’s mental state and development. Also, it makes them more involved than they need to be. Try to find another confidante for venting or hire a real therapist.

Establishing a complex child custody agreement

Some couples are tempted to make overly complicated schedules to meet a child custody agreement in Missouri; there are even times when the child is switching houses every other day. A complex arrangement typically confuses the child more instead of helping them through a divorce.

Consider an agreement where the child is staying at the same location for at least a few days in a row. That way, they can have quality time with each parent and stability in their environment.

Discussing money in front of the child

Divorce not only changes your relationship status, but it changes how you approach everyday life. A significant aspect of our daily routines is money. It may be tempting to make comments about late child support checks or “fair payment” for the children’s clothes or toys.

But the comments will eventually affect the child’s thinking. They may even feel guilt over asking for specific items due to money issues. If you are having financial problems with your spouse, consider visiting a mediator or returning to court to adjust any support.

Neglecting your child during a stressful situation

No one wants to downplay the challenges that come with a divorce. You are dealing with a stressful situation that takes an emotional toll on you. However, most children also experience significant psychological damage during a parent’s divorce. They need to be addressed just as much as you.

Luckily, it is easy to help your child deal with divorce. All you need to do is be there for them and help them transition into their new lifestyle. It may even make your transition smoother in the process.

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